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ASUS first Asian PC maker to warn of price hikes... in 2.5 months

Exclusive ASUS has confirmed the UK list price of computers are expected to rise on average by nine per cent in the Christmas quarter due the weakening of the British pound versus the US dollar. Unlike American rivals Dell and HP Inc, the Asian PC makers have been far slower to react to currency swings, with Lenovo and Acer still unable …
Paul Kunert, 19 Jul 2016
A man talks angrily into his mobile. Photo via Shutterstock

Did your UK biz just pay £1,500 to stop a DDoS? You've been had

What kind of a grifter pretends he's going to DDoS you? The kind that easily makes off with a lot of cash, it seems. "Hackers" who have been making empty DDoS threats while posing as the Armada Collective appear to have have moved on. No, they didn't stop scamming people, they just changed their modus operandi: they're now …
John Leyden, 04 May 2016
AMD CEO Lisa Su speaking at the firm's 2015 financial analyst day

Hands up, who prayed for AMD? Well, it worked

About a year ago, we asked you to pray for AMD. It's working. AMD has announced a joint venture with a Chinese manufacturer that will churn out server processors using mini-Chipzilla's technologies in the Middle Kingdom. It also said it will bank about $1.5bn from three new games console chips over the next three or four years …
Chris Williams, 22 Apr 2016

12,000 chopped: Intel finds its inner paranoid

Only the Paranoid Survive, or so former Intel chief executive Andy Grove once wrote. And it seems that, faced with the demise of the PC market, Intel CEO Brian Krzanich has found his inner Andy Grove. Grove, who died last month aged 79, left both an awesome business record and some great quotes behind him. While Intel co- …

Oof! Acer suffers 25 per cent hit to PC sales in turbulent Q1

Acer and Lenovo's PC sales tumbled during the first three months of 2016 as the EMEA market contracted by 10 per cent, according to Gartner. While everybody except Asus was down compared to 12 months ago, Acer was the single biggest loser. The ailing notebook maker shipped 26.4 per cent fewer PCs – 1.5m units – leaving it …
Gavin Clarke, 19 Apr 2016
Windows 10 market share Dec 2015 to Feb 2016

Windows 10 claimed another point of desktop share in February

Windows 10 is still growing, but its rate of growth has flattened to about one per cent of market share per month. El Reg makes that assertion on the basis of our monthly look at three sources of data: the ratings firms Netmarketshare and StatCounter, plus the US government's analytics dump of 90 days of windows-sourced …
Simon Sharwood, 02 Mar 2016
HP ZBook 17 mobile workstation

Who hit you, HP Inc? 'Windows 10! It's all Windows 10's fault'

HP Ink – the PC and printers half of the Hewlett-Packard split – has blamed Windows 10 for a ho-hum quarter of declining sales. "Windows 10 is a tremendous operating system platform," HP Ink CEO Dion Weisler told analysts and investors on a conference call on Wednesday afternoon. "But we have not yet seen the anticipated Win10 …
Chris Williams, 25 Feb 2016
Axe, image via Shutterstock

Vodafone puts hundreds of Brits on the 'at risk of layoffs' list

Vodafone has embarked on a major cost purge that could see hundreds of workers laid off, insiders have told The Register. El Reg was contacted by staff at the telco who told us around one-fifth of those put at risk of redundancy are techies, but that many more in “customer-facing” roles will go too. Vodafone employed 12,391 …
Kat Hall, 17 Feb 2016
UK PC repair shop

Shopping for PCs? This is what you'll be offered in 2016

The personal computer market has been in the doldrums for years, with global sales falling under 300 million a year, slipping nine per cent in 2015 alone. But there are also some rays of light in the market, as Intel's predictions of a sales rebound were confirmed by a nice little bump in sales over Christmas, due in part to …
Simon Sharwood, 15 Feb 2016

Alphabet, cough, Google most valuable biz on Earth as it pours billions into 'other bets'

Alphabet, Google's new parent-holding-company-thing, has reported stellar end-of-year results: revenues in the final quarter of 2015 hit $21.3bn, and profit reached $4.9bn. The figures pushed Alphabet's stock price up eight per cent in after-hours trading, making it, for the moment, the most valuable company on the planet by …
Iain Thomson, 01 Feb 2016
Kids car snow, image via Shutterstock

Cloud growth? Take a number, Microsoft. Two engines have stalled

Microsoft’s second fiscal quarter showed a company at a dangerous stage in its transition. It also revealed a firm that is unable to rely on the certainties of old. Not so long ago, Microsoft could call on three engines of growth to drive its business – Office/personal productivity, server and tools, and Windows client …
Gavin Clarke, 30 Jan 2016
Our plucky Playmonaut celebrates his riches with a bevy of beauties

Stop everything! PC sales did increase in the UK over Christmas

Finally some PC shipments have arrived on our desk that reveal the products customers are actually buying – and the real picture is far less negative than most other analysts’ stats state. Both IDC and Gartner track shipments into distributors and retailers, not actual sales to punters, and after a sustained period of channel …
Paul Kunert, 27 Jan 2016
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Dixons Carphone to shut down 134 shops

Dixons Carphone Warehouse is shutting 134 shops, a move it insists will have "no impact on colleague numbers". The retail borg is consolidating its stores following the merger between Dixons Retail, owner of Currys and PC World, and Carphone Warehouse in May 2014. The new stores will house its remaining outlets under one roof …
Kat Hall, 26 Jan 2016
Files in manager's desk drawers: manila folder marked "Redundancies". Image via shutterstock

VMware to 'axe 900 jobs'

VMware is mimicking cost-cutting actions at alpha shareholder EMC by pushing through its own job cull: 900 roles, to be specific, or some five per cent of the 18k-strong global workforce. The axe is being shined by Virtzilla, reportedly to counter a weaker sales pipeline and share price drop. Let’s face it, nothing gets …
Paul Kunert, 25 Jan 2016

Apple CEO visits EU regulator to discuss tax bill

Apple chief executive Tim Cook met European competition commissioner Margrethe Vestager in Brussels last week, apparently to discuss the European Commission's investigation into the company's tax affairs. The Commission confirmed that a meeting had taken place but said it could give no further details. The Commission is …
OUT-LAW.COM, 25 Jan 2016

Puppet Labs guards cash pile, gets chilly over IPO plans

Puppet Labs has laid out plans to scale up its R&D and sales operations, after tapping a credit line and apparently putting plans for a Spring IPO on ice. The IT automation vendor said last May that it expected to hit revenues of around $100m in 2015, and to make a stock market debut this spring. However, while last year saw …
Joe Fay, 20 Jan 2016
AMD bloodbath

Is that light at the end of AMD's dark tunnel, or God sparking up a cig?

Analysis AMD claims there is light at the end of its tunnel, but the beleaguered chip maker is having a hard time pointing it out. The Intel rival's share price was down 6.15 per cent to US$1.83 in after-hours trading on Tuesday; investors quickly moved after AMD published the financial figures for its final quarter of 2015, and for …
Chris Williams, 20 Jan 2016
Toilet

Viglen staff mark CEO Tkachuk's passing with a royal tribute

Now that Viglen boss Bordan Tkachuk has split, some of his underlings have marked his passing with some passings and markings of their own at the previously off-limits C-suite shower block. Tkachuk cleared his desk before Christmas, two years after Viglen was acquired by XMA – itself owned by Westcoast Holdings – as his earn- …
Paul Kunert, 19 Jan 2016
Stanley Kubrick's The Shining

2015's horror PC market dropped nine per cent

PC sales ended 2015 on a low note, according to analyst firms IDC and Gartner. The former firm says 2015's final quarter saw 71,889,000 PCs fly off assembly lines around the world, -10.6 per cent growth compared to the same quarter in 2014. Gartner's numbers are similarly grim: 75.7 million shipped for the quarter, down 8.3 …
Simon Sharwood, 13 Jan 2016
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Former prez of Misco parent Systemax declared bankrupt

To say 2015 wasn’t exactly a vintage year for former Systemax EMEA president Perminder Singh Dale – AKA Pim Dale – is an understatement. He lost his job in the summer and by Christmas the man was bankrupt. According to the London Gazette, a bankruptcy petition was filed against Dale on 7 October by London Law Funding (LLF) Ltd …
Paul Kunert, 12 Jan 2016

Yet another music video treat from Insight Enterprises

Booze quaffed and mince pies munched, it’s time to get one's nose back to the grindstone for the IT industry’s great unwashed. But fear not those of you with post-holiday blues, we have a visual cracker for your delectation. Insight Enterprise’s marketing team were up to their old tricks again prior to Chrimbo, enlisting four …
Paul Kunert, 05 Jan 2016
icelandic_hot_spring

Cisco starts 2016 with a spring in its step, pours cash into Springpath

Cisco sources tell us the company has invested in hyper-converged infrastructure software startup Springpath and is preparing an OEM deal. It is now in a position to acquire Springpath if it wishes to do so. There were rumours and speculation, as reported on The Register, that something was happening between Springpath and …
Chris Mellor, 05 Jan 2016
woman binoculars photo via Shutterstock

Missed our Christmas crackers? Top stories from the break were...

Things might have slowed down for Christmas and New Year in your workplace but the news did not take a break. Whether you were away for the Christmas and New Year period or logged on but not exactly present, here are the biggest stories you may have missed from The Reg. The death of Debian GNU/Linux daddy Ian Murdock aged …
Gavin Clarke, 04 Jan 2016

Who will buy our darn DRAM? Micron smacked in wallet again

It was not a happy Christmas for Micron, as the numbers confirm it is suffering in the solid state memory and storage business with a fourth consecutive decline in revenues and fifth in profits. It made $3.35bn in revenues for its first fiscal 2016 quarter, compared to $4.57bn a year ago and $3.6bn in the preceding quarter, …
Chris Mellor, 30 Dec 2015
Photo From <a target="_blank" href="http://www.shutterstock.com/pic-232507384/stock-photo-christmas-holiday-happy-girl-friends-looking-at-something-on-digital-touch-screen-tablet-pc.html?src=9mJhlJ8bDz_0JV9eZNUpyQ-1-34">Shutterstock</a>

Salesforce forks out $360m, slips SteelBrick in its Christmas stocking

Salesforce has bought itself an early Christmas present in the form of a $360m (£241m) acquisition of subscription billing apps biz SteelBrick. The acquisition is expected to be wrapped up by April 2016. Salesforce is already familiar with the company's business, having poured $18m (£12m) into its coffers during a 2015. …
Kat Hall, 24 Dec 2015
Boy writes a letter to Santa. Pic via Shutterstock

Dear Santa: Can gov.UK please stop outsourcing?

Comment Here's a cheerful factoid that gets gleefully wheeled out by family lawyers each year: the first Monday after Christmas is the busiest day for divorces. Contributory factors seem to be post-Christmas financial strains, holiday season stresses and misjudged prezzies ("why the hell did/didn't this person buy me a wearable - it's …
Kat Hall, 24 Dec 2015
Zombie rising from the grave

Could NetApp's purchase of SolidFire see the end of ONTAP?

Comment NetApp has finally bitten the bullet and bought an AFA vendor, plumping for the technology-driven SolidFire as opposed to some of the marketing-driven competitors in the space. At less than a billion dollars, it appears to be a very good deal for NetApp and perhaps with an ever-decreasing number of suitors, it is a good deal …
StorageBod, 22 Dec 2015
A cute cat in a jumper waves goodbye.... Pic via Shutterstock

No £160m for you: BT to receive termination notice from Cornwall before Christmas

The High Court has ruled in favour of Cornwall Council's decision to ditch its 10-year £160m outsourcing deal with BT, following moves by the telco provider to stop the authority canning the deal. Back in August, BT filed an injunction preventing the termination of the agreement after Cornwall sought to formally can the …
Kat Hall, 22 Dec 2015

NetApp sings to Solidfire: All I want for Christmas is buying you

NetApp is buying SolidFire to get scale-out all-flash arrays for cloud provider-like use cases – the sort of use cases that are closed to NetApp's all-flash E-Series and ONTAP systems. The acquisition was rumored this month, and had a $1.2bn price tag attached to it. NetApp is paying $870m in cash for SolidFire, a move …
Chris Mellor, 21 Dec 2015
win10_648

Windows 10 won't come to old WinPhones until some time in early 2016

Microsoft has decided to delay delivery of Windows 10 for phones running Windows 8 or 8.1. Redmond's previously said that WinPhone 10 will appear in December, but is now issuing a statement to the effect that “The Windows 10 Mobile upgrade will begin rolling out early next year to select existing Windows 8 and 8.1 phones." …
Simon Sharwood, 18 Dec 2015

Dixons Carphone CEO dances on rivals’ graves, swipes share from survivors

Christmas is unlikely to come early for Brit shoppers at Dixons Carphone. Essentially, the retail borg is awash with cash so it won’t on this occasion need to slash prices to counter a summer of soggy sales. Numbers at the half-way point of fiscal ’16 – ended 31 October – filed this morning, showed like-for-like revenue up …
Paul Kunert, 16 Dec 2015
Man drying head image via Shutterstock

IBM kills Hack A Hair Dryer women-in-tech vid after backlash

Updated IBM is killing a controversial web video that employed hairdryers to supposedly promote women in STEM following an online roasting. The video was part of a campaign to: “Reengineer misperceptions about women in tech”, in which hair dryers – performing functions not normally associated with the handheld hot air device – feature …
Gavin Clarke, 07 Dec 2015
Trainspotting

Softcat set to open up Scottish operation as sales spike continues

Cuddly-named unstoppable reselling machine Softcat keeps on growing in double digits, is hiring more staff and setting up shop north of the border, according to its first trading update as a publicly traded entity. The Marlow-based tech supplier launched itself onto the London Stock Exchange last month. The listing price was …
Paul Kunert, 02 Dec 2015

Dell PCs to be never knowingly undersold by John Lewis this Chrimbo

Dell is to go head-to-head with Apple, HP and Lenovo for the affections of computer-seeking shoppers this Christmas - the XPS range will be never knowingly undersold to the middle classes by John Lewis. Sarah Shields, exec director and UK GM for channel and distribution claimed Dell could not afford to ignore the retail …
Paul Kunert, 20 Nov 2015
Lego, photo via Shutterstock

It's come to this for IBM: Watson is now a gimmick app on the iPhone

Remember when IBM's Watson was touted as a revolutionary machine learning platform that would help revolutionize the medical, science and business intelligence fields? Big Blue's expensive pet project has been showcased as a solution for everything from biomedical research to solving poverty to killing the spreadsheet. Now, …
Shaun Nichols, 19 Nov 2015

Sorry Xchanging staff, only Capita at negotiating table now

Tiny cries of anguish might have been heard across the City today as one of the suitors for London-based Xchanging confirmed it is standing up from the negotiating table, leaving only Capita seated. LSE-listed Xchanging confirmed last month it had accepted Capita’s offer of 160 pence per share offer, valuing the BPO and …
Paul Kunert, 04 Nov 2015
Sunset

Softcat CEO: No sailing off into the sunset after the IPO for me

The flotation of tech reseller Softcat will make the CEO an overnight quinquagintillionaire*, but Martin Hellawell tells us he won’t be quitting the day job any time soon. The Marlow-based biz confirmed this morning it is to list on the London Stock Exchange in November, as we predicted months ago, but top brass wants to push …
Paul Kunert, 19 Oct 2015
recruitment_hired

Microsoft hires Aussie cloudy Transformer Man to run Brit channels

Microsoft has hired Aussie and self proclaimed “chief transformer” Martin Gregory as the next person to lead the UK channel – and the man has a very cloudy background. Former channel director Linda Rendleman – who was in the role for nearly two years – quit Blighty in August and moved to Florida to run a partner team unit …
Paul Kunert, 16 Oct 2015
woman binoculars photo via Shutterstock

Windows 10 blamed (partly) for stalled PC sales recovery

The recovery in PC sales has been postponed until 2017 – and Microsoft and Windows 10 are partly to blame. Worldwide PC shipments will now fall by 8.7 per cent by the end of the year and growth won’t return for another two years, the IDC said. The number cruncher had expected that the arrival of Windows 10 in July would …
Gavin Clarke, 27 Aug 2015

Arista bullish for full year results after 47 per cent YoY growth in Q2

High-performance data centre switching upstart (and Cisco litigation target) Arista Networks has reported 47 per cent revenue growth year-on-year for the quarter ended June 30. The company's financial release says it recorded US$195.6 of revenue, and a GAAP net income of $24 million (up from $21.6 million for the corresponding …
BB_PLAYBOOK_RIM_DOWN_TOILET

Blighty tablet sales plunge 31 per cent in saturated market

The free fall descent of the tablet distribution market accelerated for the second quarter of 2015, with channel fondleslab sales plunging by 22 per cent to 2.3 million across Western Europe. Sales in the UK nosedived by 31 per cent to 410,100 units, according to the quarterly research on distribution sales compiled by analyst …
Kat Hall, 28 Jul 2015
Confused computer keyboard

Cheesy vid from inside Microsoft seller milks Office 365 for larffs

Vid El Chan has got hold of a video nasty by some senior execs at Microsoft licensing giant Insight Enterprises that appears to be a faint stab at humour over a customer’s migration to the fluffy white stuff. The short starts with Alexander Kaatz, veep of sales and marketing EMEA (he should’ve known better) acting as a sales rep, …
Paul Kunert, 10 Jul 2015
Huawei Watch

Wristjobs, whopping big 4Kers and fondleslabs: Currys' Xmas tech

Pics Retailers' “Christmas in July” press showcases may make your stomach churn at the thought of all that consumerist razzmatazz, but, season of goodwill aside, it’s also a time when new products get an airing before they go on sale in the coming months. Asus Chromebook Flip C100PA Gadgets galore and a new flipping Chromebook …
Bob Dormon, 08 Jul 2015
Microsoft's Surface Hub

Gonna RUB MYSELF against the WALL: Microsoft's Surface Hub 84" monster-slab

Pics Microsoft will take orders for its ridiculo-sized Surface Hub, a huge wall-mounted touchscreen, from July 1, albeit at hefty prices - but it won't be shipping direct to punters. The smaller of the two debut Surface Hub models is a 55-inch, 1080p-resolution version that Microsoft says is designed for offices, small conference …
Neil McAllister, 10 Jun 2015
Android icon desktop toys

Bank: Without software mojo, Android OEMs are doomed to 'implode'

Analysis You’ve heard that “when Wall Street sneezes, the world catches cold"*, and there are dozens of variations. But perhaps the line needs to be brought up to date. When a large technology platform company dozes off, companies that rely on it for innovation feel the chill – and the chill can be fatal. Ten days ago, investment bank …
Andrew Orlowski, 01 Jun 2015
Microsoft CEO Satya Nadella

It's FREE WINDOWS 10 time: 29 July is D-Day, yells Microsoft

Windows 10 will be coughed up by Microsoft on July 29, the company said on Monday morning – and Windows 7 and 8.1 users can reserve their free upgrade right now. Gratis upgrades to Windows 10 are pegged to last for 12 months, as previously announced by Microsoft. That gives you until the end of July 2016 to claim them. Also, on …
Gavin Clarke, 01 Jun 2015

Good luck displacing Windows 7, Microsoft, it's still growing

If it's the first Monday of the month, and it is, it must be time to have a look at desktop operating system market share as recorded by StatCounter and Netmarketshare. It looks like the skids are really under Windows XP now. Netmarketshare has it down from 16.94 per cent to 15.93 per cent. StatCounter has a dip to 10.91 per …
Simon Sharwood, 03 May 2015
Terry Myerson, exec veep at Microsoft

ONE BEELLION Windows 10 devices?! OH REALLY

Windows chief Terry Myerson in the thick of friendlies at Microsoft’s Build conference has predicted one billion devices will be running Windows 10 in its first two to three years. He reckons the big lift will come from a wave of Windows 7 users upgrading to Windows 10 and people buying 2-in-1s – laptops that double as tablets. …
Gavin Clarke, 30 Apr 2015
arrow pointing up

Thought your dept was on budget this year? THINK AGAIN, matey

Tech buyers will likely need to revisit budget forecasts at the month's end with another price hike on commodity hardware to be pushed through by vendors in response to the relative appreciation of the dollar. Since last summer the US currency is up 15 per cent against the UK Pound (the impact on the Euro is even more pronounced …
Paul Kunert, 20 Apr 2015
Woman packs up contents of desk. Image via shutterstock

IBM: No compulsory redundancies in Systems Middleware

IBM has confirmed that enough workers in the UK Systems Middleware division have volunteered to leave with a redundancy cheque, so compulsory lay-offs will not be required. The plan to cut 10 per cent of the 736-strong business unit was put into action in February, when workers entered into consultation with Big Blue and formed …
Paul Kunert, 01 Apr 2015

Opinion

Baby looks taken aback/shocked/affronted. Photo by Shutterstock

Kat Hall

Plans for 2 million FTTP connections in next four years 'not enough'
Microsoft CEO Satya Nadella
Stranded_ships

Chris Mellor

Thousands of layoffs announced as spinning rust enters its death spiral

Features

STRASBOURG, JUNE 29, 2016: The seat of the European Parliament. by Marco Aprile for shutterstock. EDITORIAL USE ONLY
Plan b, image via Shutterstock
EU workers, new markets: post-Brexit pressure on May & Co
Tough question, pic via Shutterstock
Honest mistake with your licensing? Audit police look at it on a 'case by case basis'